One week. It's been one week since I graduated from Adler University. I started this blog five years ago as a way to chronicle my experience in graduate school. I knew starting out that my experience would likely be like many others, but something I would want to remember and reflect on. Anyone who knows me, knows I'm a very introspective and reflective person, sometimes to my detriment. So, you can imagine that graduation kicked that into high gear. Many people have been asking me if I feel any differently and that has been a hard question to answer. So here is my best response after a week of reflection: Yes!...and no.
Let me start with why I don't feel much different. It's the short answer! :) No, I don't feel any different because I'm continuing to do the work I've done for years, now with a piece of paper that says I officially know what I'm doing. No, because it hasn't changed how I view or approach my work with clients or my passion for this work. No, because even though I'm done with my degree, I am not done learning. My clients teach me new things each day.
Now for the yes. Yes, I feel differently because I've achieved what I have worked my butt off for. There were many times I was fairly certain I would not be able to finish this program. My philosophy was, "Keep your head down and push through." Probably not something you will hear many therapists say in session! But at the time, it felt too overwhelming to process all the stress. So yes, I feel different because at some point on Sunday all the stress, all the anxiety, all the worry of whether or not I would make it started to fade. Don't get me wrong, I still have stress, but no longer do I have five years of compounded, unrelenting stress. It was one of the greatest feelings. So yes, I feel a heck of a lot different because the person leaving graduate school is a different person than the young, 22-year-old who started five years ago.
I'd like to be able to describe how I am different or what exactly I've learned. I could tell you all about the factual knowledge I have gained. But that doesn't seem to get at exactly what I am taking away from this experience. And this blog post would get way too long. At the same time, I'm not sure I could write about it all and do it justice. So, I will leave you with just one lesson I'm taking away: Relationships are powerful. They can hurt, and they can heal. Both in my personal and professional life I have seen and experienced the power that love, kindness, and compassion have in everyone's life, no matter who they are or where they come from. It seems like this is exactly what we all need to be reminded of in the current political and social climate. Some of the best and most healing relationships I have are with individuals whom I disagree with on a variety of issues. But, at the end of the day they have given me love, kindness, and compassion.
So as a now full-fledge psychologist, I'm going to try my best to lead with love, kindness, and compassion. I'm going to try to approach people with curiosity, not judgement, with a desire to listen before being heard. But guess what, you don't need a doctorate to do any of these things. I am hopeful that I have encouraged some of you who follow me to do the same. Imagine what the world would be like if we loved more, criticized less and listened more than we speak. That's just this doctor's opinion.
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